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Posted: 10/31/01

Real World 10: Episode 16,
or "Going Solo"
by Janet Branagan


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Remember the whole possibility of Lori and Kevin kissing in a tree? Well, we're kind of back on that as Lori starts in with, "My friendship with Kevin is better than it's been. He hasn't made me sad recently so that's a plus." Yeah, I would say. Kevin meanwhile, has a philosophy when it comes to the women roomies, "The girls in the house are going to be like our sisters." I still don't think Lori has got that memo, Kev. If I were you I'd pass it out again.

Kevin's caught himself a woman. Not just any woman, a woman who is a model (I'm told these are the very best kind.) Kevin breaks down meeting his new gal, "She's a model and she hangs out with a bunch of models." And if you think THAT statement takes the cake as the dumbest thing Kevin has ever said, just wait until the end of this episode.

After coming home from the bar the guys talk about how they finally met some hot girls or as they agree, "droppers." Well, well it seems Mike's lingo has caught on, despite it's causing so many problems earlier in the season. At least they finally wised up and learned how to be discrete when talking trash about the opposite sex.

For those of you who have been living in a cave for the past fifteen episodes, Lori dreams of being a professional singer one day. Her biggest singing related accomplishment thus far has been her contribution to the singing group, The Bostonians while in college. Every year The Bostonians have a final show, but this year is her final, final show and so she can't miss it. A bigger hassle then getting there proves to be what to sing as her final song. This causes a sore spot to resurface with the roomies since Lori is back to humming and singing at the most inappropriate times and the most inconvenient places. Lori doesn't understand (again) why they aren't supportive, while the roommates (again) wish she would just shut the hell up. Coral for one has little time to be sympathetic feeling Lori herself is to blame for her procrastination.

Kevin is out on the town with his lady friend, Beth. Kevin and Beth are in that "getting to know you" phase and he's telling her about his housemates. "I wouldn't trade the two guys I live with for anybody in the world." He then segues into the girls and says, "Lori and Rachel are cool but Lori needs a lot of attention from guys." No mention of Coral or Nicole here. There's also no mention of his semi interest in Lori way back when. Kevin says he really likes Beth and even mentions how they can "finish each other's sentences." Kids, trust me on this, by the end of this recap you will know just how dead on that statement was.

Back at the house, Lori is following Malik around, demanding to know about Kevin's new girl. Apparently Lori and Britney Spears have a few things in common, as they both know the words to "Don't Let Me Be The Last To Know" all too well. Malik tries to dodge Lori's execution style line of questioning but we all know Malik ain't the best when it comes to confrontation. He confirms that Kevin is seeing someone and he also mentions that she was in Maxim. Nice move Malik. Let the girl down easy by revealing that Kevin is not only seeing a girl, but a MODEL. Lori wonders why Kevin doesn't tell anybody about these things. Malik's silence says it all. Lori quickly realizes that it might not be a case of Kevin not confiding, but merely a situation where Kevin isn't confiding IN HER.

Kevin like Beth. Kevin like Beth a lot. He's leaving in a month though so he's seriously bumming. Speaking of bumming, Lori gets to see the couple firsthand and has a few comments. "They're all cuddling and everything and I'm thinking oh God, I remember when I used to be like that...with...boyfriends." You know Lori was grasping for a name here but frankly, nothing came out.

Lori goes home and talks to Coral about Kevin and his girl. "They looked related," confesses Lori. Lori argues that it's ironic that Kevin says he doesn't like her because he thinks of her like a sister, but then goes out and dates girls that "Could be his twin." Touché, Lori. Lori whispers to Coral, "She's not that cute." I have to say that I agree, and I am the impartial one here. Coral responds, "What do you mean she's not that cute? Neither is Kevin." (DAMN!) This causes both girls to fall into fits of giggles. Well, at least Coral made Lori feel better for a little while.

Cut to Lori walking with Kevin and Rachel and in mid sentence saying, "...I mean, the guys in the house sort of had the experience that I thought all of us were gonna have... fantasy, vacation romances." I see her point, but her tone of contempt towards the guys (namely Kevin) is where she loses her cool. Lori says she wanted it to be like Sex and the City and Rachel grins. Who is Lori kidding anyway? Kevin had her at hello.

Kevin fakes a hollow attempt (what he does best after all) at comforting Lori. Rachel, once again, walks along in silence wearing her t-shirt that says, "Third Wheel." Kevin starts in with how he really doesn't want a relationship. (Huh? What? Is this real time or REAL WORLD time where demonic editing has tricked us once again?) Kevin piles on some crap about being scared to commit since his parents divorce. I find it funny that Kevin shows the girls one side, the "sensitive, scared to commit because of his parents divorce," Kevin but when with the boys it becomes the, "I'm all about the booty" Kevin. Which one is it Kev? Huh!? HUH!!!! Whatever happened to remission boy with a new lease on life anyway?

Rachel seems excited that the group is all going together to see Lori perform. "It's perfect timing to go on vacation together because we are all getting along." Dude, didn't you guys just go on vacation together? Kevin praises Lori's organizing of the whole trip, especially since she's performing too. I don't see him offering to help, but whatever.

Lori gets up bright and early and through clenched teeth wakes the crew, urging them to get ready. Miraculously, it looks like they get out of the house without much delay. Once they finally get to Boston Lori gets lost. Poor Rachel is driving the other car full of the helpless guys. Coral's meanwhile keeping it real via walkie-talkies (man, Lori really thought some of this out). Finally at their destination- Lori is pummeled with parallel parking woes of the past as she manages to nix a car. Not just any car, but the car of the concierge who is directing her. Needless to say, these two are far from being the best of friends. Lori and crew get into cabs and scurry off to the concert. She's frazzled and understandably so, but they manage to make it on time.

Lori leads The Bostonians in a rousing rendition of Aretha Franklin's "Respect." Everything about Lori says, "look at me," even her blue striped dress made her stand out as if she were the lead in her high school play. I thought that everyone got a turn at a solo, but maybe I was mistaken.

Lori chooses the song "Hold On" by Sarah McLachlan for her long awaited solo. It's hard to say what the crowd's real impression of the song was. When panning the audience we saw some people seem moved but we also saw strangers stifling laughter. Finally we see Coral with her head on Mike's shoulder. Coral with her head on Mike's shoulder. And yes, I purposely wrote that twice to drive the point home. Kevin tells Lori that the show was "incredible" and Lori is beaming as if, well as if, Kevin had just given her a compliment.

Kevin and Beth are walking arm and arm. Kevin states, "I like Beth a lot, but I think, actually I know that, I don't want to have a long distance relationship." So much for young love. The following is an ACTUAL CONVERSATION that went down between Kevin and Beth:

Kevin- "I just need to like, you need to realize that like you're not I mean."

Beth- "No, whatever."

Kevin- "It's not gonna like- you know what I mean? That like we don't know how often."

Beth- "Yeah, no, it's cool. No, I'm fine."

Kevin- "Do you understand that?"

Beth- "No, yeah I totally understand."

Umm...I'm glad SOMEBODY DID! GOOD LORD! AND KEVIN THINKS THESE TWO AREN'T PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER? It seems his "we finish each other's sentences" statement really came back to bite him on the ass. No one ever means that literally, but apparently the Kevster did.

Kevin proceeds to explain (in plain English) that he will miss her and he knows she will miss him too. But before you start feeling all sorry for the lovebirds, they cut to "raw footage" (you know, that annoying black and white crap they pull sometimes) of Kevin and Mike talking. Kevin is saying, "We're all players." Mike comes back with, "I'm not about to settle down with some girl." Kevin agrees and says, "Yeah, exactly."

Kevin confesses to Mike that he thinks Beth is falling for him really hard. Mike gives it back though and says, "You're not falling for her?" Kevin fumbles, "Well, I mean I am, kinda, but I understand the circumstances. In 30 days I'll be at UT with the hottest girls in the world who will all want to party with me." Woah, doesn't that statement just say it all? It seems Kevin has already left New York and has officially traveled to the quaint town called "Deluded: Population, Kevin."

Janet Branagan is a freelance writer and pop culture lover from New Jersey.

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